Touchnote to Spidey-Moneyman

Wednesday April 11th 2018

Waking Up Woke

(For context, see previous post.)

Touchnote 2018-04-11 to GLO Spidey Money.jpeg

 

Touchnote 2018-04-11 to GLO Spidey Message.jpg

 

(And to make amazing postcards that get mailed to YOUR loved ones, see Touchnote.com!)

#FWIW

#Touchnote.com

#WakeUpWoke


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At Rise: Spidey Money Dream

aka:  How to Wake Up Woke

Wednesday, April 11th 2018

SpiderManMoney

AT RISE:  Mom has moved 9 y/o Gavin and 6 y/o ClaraJane to the big bed where all are waking up for the day.

GAVIN:  Mom,  I had a dream that I was like Spiderman?  Except instead of web shooting out of my hand, a million dollars would appear in my hand whenever I wanted.  I showed it to you and then of course you made me deposit most of it in my bank account.  But then when you and daddy were doing taxes, I paid you like $100,000 to pay attention to me instead of taxes.  [laughs]  But then I was able to donate to -what’s that Revolution organization?- yeah, OurRevolution.  And also to those two guys who are cleaning plastic out of the ocean, because I really want to support those guys.  And to places that are like,  helping immigrants and stuff like that.  Yeah.  And then I could use it to help stop crime.  Because; most people who commit crime do it for money, and…

CLARAJANE:   YEAH!!  Because the reason bank robbers rob is for the money?  So you could just SHOOT the money at their head so they turn and look?  [giggles]  And then you could keep shooting the money in the direction you want them to go, like prison?  And the robbers would just keep following the money all the way.  Then the police could open the door to the stall?   And you just shoot the money in there and they go in there?  Then the police could just shut the door behind them and lock it with the key!

MOM & GAVIN:  [Nodding in agreement.]

SCENE.

#WakeUpWoke and  #FollowYourDreams

Spiderman-with-Box-Office-Money--35434


♥♥

Posted in activism, art, Bernie Sanders, childhood, comedy, domestic life, education, evidence they get along, faith, family, fight, health, learning, love, mental health, money, politics, racial injustice, social justice, The Progressive Movement | 1 Comment

ClaraJane and Simra – Puppet Theatre

Sunday, April 8th 2018

Thoroughly enjoyed these two oft-inseparable pals performing a series of PUPPET SHOWS (in my kids’ bedroom which has recently been cleaned up for a change, halleluia).

Simra & ClaraJane’s Puppet Theatre

 

Then they resumed their doll play as usual, this time with a double twist in the form of a triple doll stack!


♥♥♥

Posted in animals, childhood, comedy, cousins, domestic life, evidence they get along, family, health, learning, love, making art, mental health, parenthood, patience, Performing Life | 1 Comment

MamaRazzi: Finaly a Use for Wagon Wheel

March 31st 2018

mamarazzi.jpg

 

Out with my son somewhere, the song “Wagon Wheel” is playing in the background.  Perhaps due to my abject aversion to this song my son is unfamiliar with it.  Hearing the refrain, he erupts, “Oh my god that’s so perfect!  MAMARAZZI!  That’s what you are mom!!  The MamaRazzi!!!”

The words are actually, “Hey Mama ROCK ME.”   But who gives.

“So rock me mama like a wagon wheel
Rock me mama anyway you feel
Hey mama rock me
Rock me mama like the wind and the rain
Rock me mama like a south-bound train
Hey mama rock me”

Blarg.

In the movie Wayne’s World there is a sign that says, “NO STAIRWAY TO HEAVEN.”            I fantasize about wearing a sign -at least in Open Mic settings- that says, “NO WAGON WHEEL.”

Either way I am:

  1.  Guilty as charged; “MamaRazzi.”  and moreover,
  2.  So relieved to finallly have a practical use for this infernal song.  Gah!

No Stairway – Denied [12 seconds]


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My Brother Robert Playing Music

March 31st 2018

A rather sloppy video of some very fine musicians messing around.

2018-03-31 Robert & Sasha Playing Music Stuffs [5:05]:

 

#Hanging@theLine


♥♥

 

Posted in art, childhood, comedy, family, health, love, making art, mental health, music, Performing Life, siblings | Tagged | 2 Comments

TSA Times: Ma’am Where Are Your Kids Devices?

Wednesday, March 28th 2018

SECURITY CHECK:

airplane mode

Going through airport security rigmarole, we receive the myriad instructions from TSA agents; shoes off, laptops out, jackets in the tray, etc.   

“Any other devices bigger than a cellphone also need to be out in the tray,” says the agent.

I put my computer and cellphone in the bin, and the kids put in their backpacks. 

TSA man looks at me and says, “Any tablets, computers or personal devices go in the tray.” 

I look back at him and blink from the fog of having slept only 3 hours in two days.

He gestures toward the kids, “Ma’am, do they have any tablets or computers?”

“Oh god no!” I blurt out, “We live in the REAL world.”  Unfiltered and delirious I continue, “I want them to have HEALTHY brain development!” 

“That’s good,” he says.

We walk through the metal detector. 

“Yeah, I believe in parenting,” I tell him.

“I hear you,” he offers, “It’s rare these days.” 

I KNOW, right?

I don’t mean to be self-righteous, congratulatory or sanctimonious. 

BUT; 

I have to muzzle myself with such regularity in the restaurants where I work while parents FRY their kids’ brains on video devices the entire time BEFORE, DURING and AFTER dinner… it feels good to just say it out loud.   In front of people and everything.   

It’s not that I’m *surprised* the TSA guy assumed I was forgetting to pull out my kids’ devices…  I… I… maybe just felt a little indignant to bump up against yet another manifestation of our culture’s unhinged addiction to replacing parenting and relationships with video devices;  the TSA agent assumes I must be *forgetting* to display my kids’ devices, which they obviously must have.  

Pass the barf bag!

barf emoji.jpg

********

Once in our seats I have the kids take out their journals and do at least a couple pages each before gorking out on the airplane’s cornucopia of video selections.  (Like, why would we even need their own devices as well?)   

Soon after takeoff I’m crafting this post when Gavin interrupts to insist I watch this scene with him: 

Diary of a Wimpy Kid: The Long Haul | “No Devices” Clip [1 minute]:

“But… without devices… there’s nothing to DO!”

 

OMG I could not tear myself away and watched the rest of it with my son, one earbud each.  I’m telling you, Alicia Silverstone and the whole cast is EXCELLENT in this movie.  My newest favorite movie!

(And yes, I’m aware the irony of starting this post about no devices and ending it by watching a movie with my son.  Welcome to treading the balance with reasoned judgement to the best of my limited ability.)

Shrug-Emoticon-Japanese-Kaomoji-Download.jpg


♥♥♥

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Hospital Clowning: Twinsies with Gonzo

Friday, March 23rd 2018

img_3541

Drs. Be Bopper & GonZo: Twins for a Day

 

1) Are You Jenny the Juggler?jtj

First thing this morning we are stopped in the hall by a Cardiology Nurse who calls me out and gushes that she has video footage of me on her phone from a birthday party that her daughter always asks to watch.  We chat and I give her some Laughter League collateral and she says “Oh my daughter is going to be blown away!”

 

2)  Dental Dance Party

dental danceOne of the technicians in the Dental Clinic toured us all around the floor, culminating with a command performance in a tiny office with three nurses dancing to our spontaneous antics.  The one who commandeered us insists I must learn “Soul Sister” on the ukulele.  I am thankful for the direction because I need another song that’s always gonna hit besides “I Wanna Be Like You” from the Jungle Book.

 

3)  You Can’t Wear Thatbig-guy-in-tutu

In the waiting room of the Dental Clinic there is a man utterly scandalized by Dr. Gonzo’s tutu.   Gonzo is wearing elements I provided him from deely boppers all the way down to socks.  “DO NOT LET HER DRESS YOU EVER AGAIN,” says the man, “YOU GOTTA LOSE THE TUTU!”

 

4)  Where Are You Going?

bewildered faceOn the floor of mostly Super Attentive Babies, there is an extremely spunky four year old by himself.  He has figured out how to use the call button to summon the nurses without restraint.  “Remember to only use that button when you have a nursing problem, not just when you want somebody to play with you, okay?” they plead.  So he picks up the phone, calls the operator and asks if they can come to his room and play.  (!)   It’s only 10:45am and already the nurses are amused but exasperated.  I offer them my empathy, but kudos to the kid.  How awesome is he at advocating for himself!  Four years old and all alone in a hospital room?  Hell yeah baby, call everyone you want.  We go in and show our stuff.  Then he wants to show us how he plays this video game.  We say we can watch for a minute before we have to go.  “But where are you going?” he asks.

 

5)  If It’s Not One Thing It’s a Mothermom

We stop by a room by special request; a personal friend of family.  The patient is another child about exactly my son’s age,  One who enjoyed seemingly perfect health like my son too, until a recent diagnosis of leukemia.  I always wonder how these parents do it.  And now that I got to see this one, I am inspired and think I can visualize having what it takes to be in those shoes.  It was just really great connecting with this awesome mom, and we are both delighted by the visit which is great because her child actually wanted nothing to do with us clowns.

 

6)  Wait, SHH!

shhPlaying the doorway of a high precaution patient, Gonzo hears the click-clack of someone’s heels nearing us in the hallway.  “Shh!  Someone’s coming!” he says, and we both halt the juggling and singing and FREEZE.  We act overtly nonchalant and whistle while the person walks by… then resume after they pass.  It was a very satisfying PAUSE in action, which is a perfect form of Dynamic Rhythm and an excellent theatrical device.  By the response of everyone around us I can say I am not the only one who loved it.

 

7)  Crouching Pout, Hidden Smile

poutThis four year old girl was not giving up her pout for nothing; not for juggling, music, silly stuff, farts noises, no-thing.  “OK what about this,” I ask, producing a nice solid “BUURRP.”  Gonzo startles,smirk recoiling in a high-pitched shriek of  moral outrage, and there it is.  The corner of that little girl’s mouth curls into a SMILE; not one she is willing to acknowledge or anything,  because she’s very busy pouting you see, and we are super dumb clowns.  But everyone actually SAW that smile anyway and let me tell you it was CUTE.

 

8) T.G.I.F.

We finish Fridays in the Emergency Department.  After playing to patients in the waiting room we drift around the bays looking for patients we can perk up in their rooms.  It was smooth and lovely and delightful and fun… also the first time in my short time here I find myself a little low energy and without the drive to come up with anything too new and fresh.  We default to singing and juggling and standard stuff, but I notice it’s still not too bad.  So while I’m not proud of a lower energy period, I’m comforted in the thought that we still know what to do.

friday

Gonzo finally loses the tutu


Posted in art, childhood, comedy, education, family, health, Hospital Clowning, Laughter League, learning, love, making art, mental health, music, parenthood, patience, Performing Life, ukeoke, ukulele, work | 1 Comment

That Time Your Child Spontaneously Gives a Speech at a Political Forum

Wednesday, March 21st 2018

So I take my kids to the library to screen this documentary about the Women’s March:

 

2018-03-22 march

…what it means to stand up for your values in today’s America.

 

I didn’t even ask if they WANTED to.  Especially in light of the fact that Gavin recently expressed regret to me for missing out on some of the political events I’ve invited him to, like the rally with Bernie Sanders and Elizabeth Warren.  Besides it was because of HIM that we went all the way to D.C. for the March in the first place; this documenetary is about US.

The film is great, showcasing the historical outpouring of people rallying in support of women’s rights and human rights and social justice around the GLOBE, including our very own Boston, Oakland and D.C. (and EVERY continent around the world).

The discussion afterwards is a little dry so when the kids get restless I hand them paper and writing implements.  ClaraJane colors rainbows, birds and love notes while my son starts writing what I take to be a journal entry or something, but lo!  It’s a “SPEECH.”  And when it’s time for public comment he raises his hand, waits with painstaking patience and even cues up behind a blowhard mansplainer until the moderator can no longer overlook the child waiting to speak.  Here he go:

2018-03-21 GAVIN’S POLITICAL STATEMENT AT 9 Y/O [1:31]: 

 

I always tell him that when a child SPEAKS it is more powerful than all the adults in the room.  I did now know he was going to test the theory this night!

In related news, I also discover the ONE THING apparently powerful enough to keep me from speaking MY piece, and that is the maternal duty of staying the hell OUT th’ way of your determined child.   I’m proud to say that besides the pencil and paper to absorb his fidgeting, and helping him wait his turn, I did nothing to influence what he said or did.

It was ALL GAVIN.

2018-03-21 19.33.54

“Everyone Matters.”  What a concept.

 

pussy cat pussy hat emoji


!

#HowBoutThat  #EveryoneMatters  #ThisIsWhatAFeministLooksLike  #ThisIsWhatDemocracyLooksLike #PussyPower   #TheChildrenAreTheFuture  #FuckTrump  #FuckTrumpsAgenda  #RacistsNazisAndFascistsCanGoPleaseFuckOffAndDieNOW  #SaveTheEarth  #AltRightChristianHypocrisy   #ComplicityInFlorida   #YourSilenceIsDEAFENING

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Hospital Clowning: Tuesday with Jay

Tuesday, March 20th 2018

1 )  Pre-Op Emergencyemergency button.jpg

We start the morning in Pre-Op, scrubbing in.  Our hands are barely wet when a nurse grabs us for an “Emergency!”   She brings us to the room of a boy who is visibly upset (about to go into surgery, go figure).  A few songs, bubbles and sillies later he’s calmed down and getting wheeled off to the OR.  “Thank you!” says the nurse.  “Anytime,” we say.  You totally turned him around,” she says.

 

2)  To Impress or Not to Impress
bored emojiA few bays down, after not really impressing a young boy with our dumb antics, we’re moving on.  Then from behind their curtain we hear, “I could hang out with those two ALL DAY.  They’re FUN!”
3)  Close to Homehome with heart
It finally happens; we visit a boy with the exact same name and age of my very own son.   He is charming and delightful and accompanied by two loving parents.  He properly enjoys our farts, burps, chase scenes around the curtains culminating in ventriloquist farts and Shakespearean burps.  Later we even pass him going for a walk around the hallways, so that’s encouraging.   My heart skips only a few beats.
4) My Left Foot and Right Foot
Feet2.pngWe visit a kid with only tendrils for arms whose head is supported by a halo brace suspended from above.  He summons us in without taking any of his intense focus off the screen where he shows us his three favorite things; basketball, FIFA football and gangsta rap.  He is extremely adept at manipulating the keyboard with his feet, and friendly.  We had quite the conversation in french/creole.  “Je ne parle pa fransay” he says (I don’t speak french).  “Alors je ne parles jamais creole” (well I don’t speak any Creole) I say.  Yet there we were, chatting it up the whole time.  He happily takes our postcard and sticker before we leave, one in between the toes of each of his feet.
5)  Silent Protest
Oh my.  This family with two little boys; one the patient and one a brother.  The patient colbert-emoji-emojipedia.png*almost* succeeds in proving his claim that he “can’t laugh” because of pain.  Meanwhile the little brother succeeds completely; leaning on his brother’s bed and studying us intently the whole time, he gives NO response until later in the hallway.  “Look there they are!” she says.  Finally he speaks, “But they just fart every day!” he complains.  #True.
6) Doc Skeeeter: 

img_1431

OMG:  Frankly pretty much everything Doc Skeeter does is fabulous and on point.  And fortunately I guess he’s pretty secure in himself because when we partner I seem to spend much of my time throwing him under the bus, wapping him with my outstretched arm while taking gratutitous bows, or pressing on his belly to squeeze out a long slow dramatic fart.   My favorite is when his startle response includes a fart, and then he reacts from there.
ha ha
7)  Joke Harvest du Jour
Today’s Jokes (from a 5 year old boy and 14 year old girl, respectively):
Q: How do you make a tissue dance?
A:  Put a little boogie in it.
Q:  What did one volcano say to the other?
A:  I lava you.

Q:  Why do giraffes have such long necks?
A:  Because their feet stink!
Q:  What did one alligator say to the other alligator who was stealing something?
A:  Stop being such a crookadile!
Q:  What do you call a camel with no humps?
A:  HUMPHREY!

Q:  What do you call a bear with no teeth.
A:  A gummy bear!

Q:  Why did the cookie go to the doctor?
A:  It was feeling crummy.

To which we added:

Q:  What do you call a deer with no eyes?

A:  No eyed deer!

and,

Q:  What do you call a fish with no eyes?
A:  Fsh!

Posted in art, childhood, comedy, education, health, Hospital Clowning, Laughter League, learning, love, making art, mental health, parenthood, Performing Life, ukeoke, ukulele, work | 1 Comment

Hospital Clowning: From Crying to Curious

Friday, March 16th 2018

1)  DR. JOEKULELE!:

It’s my first time partnering with Dr. Joekulele (the next newest member of the team), and we are not bad!  I enjoy his games with kids where he continually fails to guess their name, and also when he reflects on how old he was when he was their age.  lol.  OMG he has a mini dry-erase board in his pocket onto which he can draw some “X’s” that magically disappear, reappear and flit around.  It is my favorite magic I’ve seen in a long time and I have no idea how he does it.   And check him out on harmonica!  

2018-03-16 Laughter League Joekulele Harmonica [17 seconds]:

(I am trying to back him up with the tambourine in my hair. )

 

2)  FROM CRYING TO CURIOUS:

Emoji, emoticon - cryingIn a room a baby is crying.  We drop some melody on him in a pitch high intended to reach around his cries.  He perks up in curiosity and quietly soaks up our rendition of Knick-Knack Pattywhack.  Then as always it is time for us to float on out of there.  At least he doesn’t start crying again just yet.

 

3)  KIDS TEACHING CLOWNS:

owl professorIn the lobby a boy teaches me two knock knock jokes which I mix in with one of the very next patients we visit; a four year old girl stoically building a playdough strawberry (with only one hand).  She wouldn’t give up a smile or speak for any of our efforts until we finally hit upon knock knock jokes.  Turns out both her smile AND voice are adorable.

 

4) KNOCK KNOCK 1-2-3:owls

  1. Knock knock.  Who’s there.  “Who.”  Who who?        What are you and owl or something?
  2. Knock knock.  Who’s there.  “Boo.”  Boo who?              Aw it’s okay, don’t cry!
  3. Knock knock.  Who’s there.  “Tide.”  Tide who?          Tide of knock knock jokes yet?

 

5) 30 SECOND HIT:

Walking by the Ultrasound waiting room we are behind schedule but there is a pow!patient with his parents in there.  I stop to play my music box against the window (now “Pink Panther” instead of “If I Only Had a Brain“).  They love it and mom wants to take a photo.  We pose through the window and of course Joe bangs his head on the window trying to get his hat back on.  I can hear their laughter as we head down the hall and it feels very satisfying to get such a great hit in under a minute.

6) GOING UP OR DOWN:

elevator-clipart-1Waiting for one of the many elevator rides we take throughout the day, the door opens upon a family with a girl holding her own IV pole.  “Going up?” her dad asks.  “Nope sorry we’re going down,” we say.  The elevator door starts to close as the girl gasps and says, “Oh!  Come up to my room!”  The door shuts and regrettably aren’t able to follow her but that is exactly the kind of sentiment we aim to foster around here.  Forget illness, let’s PLAY!

7) PART OF WELLNESS:ha ha

In the morning we receive a call from one of the Child Life Specialists letting us know that a patient who loves us has made and displayed a portrait of a clown out of pom-poms, proudly displayed it on his door and would love for us to come pay a visit and see.   After lunch we manage a special trip and have a wonderful visit.  The kid speaks little English but his dad translates and we do his bidding, rewarded by fabulous laughter.  “Thank you so much!” his mom says, “You are part of my son’s wellness.

I even make it out of there before any tears leak out at all.

I am simply so honored and humbled by the privilege of  this work.


Posted in art, childhood, comedy, education, faith, family, fight, health, Hospital Clowning, Laughter League, learning, love, making art, mental health, parenthood, patience, Performing Life, ukeoke, ukulele, work | Tagged | 1 Comment