Thursday, September 9th 2021
It’s finally happened! Our first “Back to School” day in TWO YEARS.
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And in the next town over my sister’s got TRIPLE Back-to-School action going on:
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Now… to recover from that whirlwind Summer.
And face the whirlwind Fall fast approaching…
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Thursday, August 5th 2021
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So it’s my daughter’s turn to host the classroom pet until summer’s end.
Pascal the Gecko promised to be low maintenance and we love animals, so it was a no brainer to agree.
Some things I did not anticipate:
1) His butt is a decoy for his head, therefore I hope it’s not racist to note he has a raging case of “Zachary Disease.” (When your butt looks ex-zachary like your face.)
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2) Girlfriend is enamored of him. To wit:
Girl: Mom! Pascal is happy!
Mom: Oh good honey! How do you know?
Girl: He’s basking!!!
Mom: Oh?!
Girl: Yeah, and he just yawned. He’s so cuuuuuute!
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3) He is very handsome, expressive in his face, and charming.
Yep I said it; charming. I did not count on getting charmed by a reptile.
In fact, dude is ten years old! You gotta have some pretty hardcore survival skills to be a classroom pet and make it to ten years.
So there we are, home from the pet store with our first round of 20 large crickets, and the blood bath has begun. Pascal leaps into action, strutting around like a gladiator in his habitat now teeming with live food. He’s tilting his head, squinting his eyes, licking his lips.
Lips? Ok, licking the rims of his mouth.
He dials in on the first unsuspecting cricket, and I kid you not he wiggles his little head-like butt appendage just like a cat does before pouncing, and then pounces! Well, more like he strikes. He’s lightning quick and makes swift order of commanding the arena. We watch him crunch down on one cricket as its eye pops off. Crickets bite the dust left and right as the quaint little adorable and charming Pascal gobbles them down, one after the other. A stray cricket leg is strewn on the floor. It’s all quite something to behold.
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Me: Wow babe this is amazing. I can hardly believe it. And look! I’m just sitting here watching without taking any photos. I have no time to blog these days so I refuse to take any photos.
Cat: [Also gets totally engrossed in watching the drama unfold.]
Me: Dammit!
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It seems none in our family are immune to the drama, as they ply me with their own photos of “Look at that Cat looking at that gecko looking at those crickets!”
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Have I mentioned I probably have undiagnosed ADHD and am highly distractible?
Monday, August 2nd 2021
DAYTIME.
DAYTIME!
Day.
Time.
Is NOT.
What.
Hanging out.
On SCREENS.
Is.
For.
*Unless.
*UNLESS you are ACTIVELY
(meeting a responsibility)
(or helping someone, or)
CREATING SOMETHING!
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*
Monday, June 28th 2021
AT RISE: Mom is at the dentist’s office getting settled in the dentist chair.
Assistant: Here you are. [Starts adjusting equipment in the room.]
Mom: Thanks. [Starts feeling an almost imperceptible pulsing between the left and right side of the chair on her back.]
Mom: Is this chair massaging me?
Assistant: Yes. So you can roolax.
Mom: Huh! Somehow I don’t remember that from before. Is it new?
Assistant: Maybe I only put you in the other chairs before.
Mom: Ah. I’m moving up in the world!
Assistant: You… are moving… out?
Mom: No. I said, “I’m moving up in the world.”
Assistant: Oh.
Mom: Because I’m in the massage chair now.
Assistant: Yes. So you can roolax.
Mom: Right. It was a joke.
Assistant: OK. [Issues a nervous laugh. Changes subject.] So, you are getting a crown?
Mom: Yes. But only a temporary one, right?
Assistant: Yes.
Mom: Then I shall only relax temporarily.
Assistant: [Silent.]
Me: That was also a joke
Assistant: Oh.
Mom: I can tell you when they’re coming or when they’ve just been.
Assistant: Ok. [Walks out.]
SCENE.
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Tuesday, June 22nd 2021
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Golden Retriever Shocked by a Kitten occupying his bed! [2:20]:
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When I sent this video to my (13 y/o) son, he wrote:
“he went through the 5 stages of grief! denial, anger, bargaining, depression, and finally acceptance! so funny mom.“
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OK so first of all, the Boy is spot on, as usual.
Secondly, SO spot on!
I mean, I distinctly remember learning about Elisabeth Kubler-Ross while earning my undergraduate degree in psychology. Her groundbreaking 1969 book, “On Death and Dying” is where the “Five Stages” originate.
But that my 13 y/o has implicitly learned and understands these as a matter of course, as a matter of viewing content online and understanding behavior in the world…
Well I just never would have anticipated that.
That is because I am Gen-X(L), I was born before the internet and am helping to raise the next generation who are absolutely immersed and infused with all it has to offer; the good bad and ugly.
So…anyone want to just watch that doggo video again?
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June 2021
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Even if my daughter says I’m in Generation “XL,” we still got a lot to be proud of.
Survival and adaptation-wise anyway.
Just the fact that the I N T E R N E T –and CELL PHONES– were invented in my life time, BLOWS me away.
Anyway, the Holderness Family depicts it well. Enjoy!
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“We Are Gen X” – Original Song [3:32]:
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*
Thursday, June 3rd 2021
AT RISE: Momb is near the door trying to leave the house to for an errand with Boy. Boy is sitting at his desk wearing headphones, looking at his computer screen and tying his shoe in front of an uneaten chicken wing. Dad is in in the kitchen nearby.
Momb: [As if in a zoo.] Look! He’s putting his shoes on while watching something on the computer and maybe eating a chicken wing… all at once!
Boy: [Looks at Momb coyly and speaks sweetly.] Just because you’re stupid doesn’t mean I’m stupid. [Continues tying shoe.]
Momb: Oh I see. [Pauses.] But it does make it more likely.
Boy: True. [Resumes watching computer screen.]
SCENE.
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Saturday, May 29th 2021
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On this day I realized a vision that had been years in the making.
Yes I gather and accumulate a lot of crap.
I also conserve a lot of resources and make a lot of creative and useful things with it.
So here is the corner of my daughter’s bedroom that is now finally our family MAKER SPACE.
All the “supplise!” now have a (clearly labeled) place.
Just in time for summer.
My guess is that you are either a person wondering why you are reading this, or someone who totally gets it.
Either way, there I celebrated it.
Now let the crafts begin!
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*
May 2021
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I just love the inspiration in this little TikToc.
Pasting it here for reference, and in case anyone out there needs some Lower Back Love!
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 | B Wow on Back to School 2021: Gavin 8th… |
| B Wow on Class Pet: Pascal |
 | circuskitchen on At Rise: Mom at the Denti… |
 | Yogeeta Rai on At Rise: Mom at the Denti… |
| Bubble Wow on At Rise: Mom at the Denti… |
