Rant: Mistakes

Tuesday, September 22nd 2020

Day 5 of 4th Grade Distance Learning: ClaraJane ditches pants. Jammie bottoms it is.

Mistake #1) Don’t Cry Over Spilled Coffee

Though I avoid the phone “like the plague” (can we say that anymore?), I made the mistake of making an actual live phone call on Sunday, and in my distraction consequently spilled covfefe all over my Macbook. Now I have a $1,500 dead machine. My main portal to the world is temporarily closed. And ironically my only working device is… my phone. Yay!

Mistake #2) Getting Sick.

Apparently now that I’m practically 50, eating whatever I want may perhaps require some evaluation. Not to get too personal but I lost two days to crippling gastric-esophageal debilitation. It’s not that the pain was unbearable, it just prohibited me from sleeping at night OR functioning in the day.

Side Note: When you lament to your husband that the house is falling apart because you’re too compromised to walk around picking up every little thing per usual, and he comforts you by assuring that, “Don’t worry, it will come back together.” What exactly is he referring to? Some Magical Automated Domicile Tidying and Restoration Process? ‘Cuz if that exists, what are we waiting for? Can we use it when I’m not sick?

Double Side Note: Please know that I have a good and dedicated husband. He does all the cooking, most of the laundry, lots of heavy lifting, and a shit ton of childcare. He’s been our steady job holder during the pandemic and sometimes he even spontaneously steams the floors. And I’m sorry folks, he’s taken.

Recitative: But this is my blog and my home and my now “Distance Learning Environment” and I can kvetch about clutter emanating from its pores if I want to. Even as I know I am the chief culprit behind the mess… (aka: Projects-in-Process!), I am accustomed to having the strength to tilt at the windmill.

Now I am weakened and the walls and mess are closing in just as my kids are getting their first real week of “school” underway. And do I have a handle on what is going on with that?

No I do not.

Oh and I actually have work!

Like, not a ton, but a substantial amount. Without the tools or strength to tackle it properly.

Add to that one of my learners here who peppers with updates and queries on the regular (truly every few minutes and seconds) and there go the remnants of my ability to scrape thoughts together… with this splitting headache. Much less take action on them.

I *did* hope on getting the sink full of last night’s dishes done this morning, for starters, but I have only generated more by providing Les Snacks.

I have also managed to coax my son *off* the computer a couple times during breaks today for fundamental self-care actions.

Speaking of which, much as I need to start getting on hold for Apple Care Repair, I think I will rejoice in having hobbled these sentences together for my mental survival (on my phone), and go try to take a shower. It’s not like they can’t cone find me in there P.R.N.

But first:

More Snack.

And I know we are very, very, Lucky Ones.

And crazed as I am, I still would’nt choose to send my kids to school in person during the pandemic.

And I doubt anything will ever compare to getting through cancer with a new baby and doing gigs while nursing and trying to pay exorbitant rent in the 2009 recession.

Then again, though we’ve been able to make all our ends meet for the first six months of this pandemic, that does not necessarily remain true.

Anyway, I might have 20 minutes here where both kids are immersed in their live online classes.

And OH BOY! REPUGNICANS HAVE SECURED THEIR VOTES for their next vile, regressive appointee to the United States Supreme Court. FAN-f#cking-TASTIC.

Guess I’ll see you in the shower.

End Rant.

For now.


About circuskitchen

performing artist, mom, wife, daughter, sister, aunt, niece... just a regular extraordinary person
This entry was posted in activism, childhood, CJ Sez, Corona Quarantine, domestic life, education, faith, family, fight, fighting Fascism, food, forgiveness, global inequity, health, history, homeschool, learning, love, mental health, money, parenthood, parenting, patience, politics, school, social justice, tragedy, work, work-life balance. Bookmark the permalink.

1 Response to Rant: Mistakes

  1. Bubble Wow says:

    Ooooo, Sorry you sick!
    You certainmont r the Mistress of Snack.

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