Saturday, November 21st 2015
As I play tea with my daughter this day, we are using the set made for me as a child by my Grandma Maryan. My stepmom’s mom in fact; a most industrious and multi-talented woman in her day. It’s gratifying to discover all the pieces still together and intact.
Such vestiges of childhood bring such comfort and delight, especially when sharing them with your children.
On this day I am haunted though, knowing it is my sister’s birthday, and that these confections were made by her actual grandmother (biologically). In fact she’s been living with Grandma Maryan lately, having burnt every other last bridge in her life. While it’s SO amazing Grandma Maryan is still hanging in (not without help of course; lots in fact), it’s obviously not a good long term solution. And frankly dear old Sis is scorching the crap out of that bridge right now anyway.
Even more haunting is knowing what a cute and happy, bright, adorable little girl my Sis used to be. Like, THIS CUTE:
Here is my daughter; healthy as healthy can be, energetic like rocketship, smart as everything, loving as the universe, and HILARIOUS. “Like unicorns sprinkling pixie dust,” Dad says.
That you can go from this exquisiteness to degenerative psychopath is …unthinkable. But it IS possible. Because, reality. Or lack of it. Or something. I have no freaking idea.
All you can do is all you can do. Love and support and parent your kids to the best of your judgement and ability. Require compliance with moral decency and responsible character, work your ass off both professionally and logistically, care for them completely and give to them generously without spoiling them, listen to them openly and love the hell out of them. Plus lots of snuggling and story time.
I GUESS. That’s all we all do. And the rest is up to god or chance or whatever strange luck is pulling the strings around this corner of the universe.
Oh, you can also organize the tea set and put it away lovingly for next time, because any tiny corner of order in your universe is a Corner of Order in your universe.
And then you can blog about it.