Wednesday, April 1st 2020
AT RISE: It is sunrise on Quarantine Day #19 in an apocalyptic world in every day brings a fresh horror such as the previous day in which Las Vegas starts accommodating homeless humans by painting 6-foot squares on a parking lot in which to live and sleep; New York’s Central Park becomes the stage for a field hospital like from M*A*S*H; and the Braying Narcissist in the White House turns his emergency press briefing over to a… a… Pillow Guy who –fresh from laying off employees– tells us to… to… read the bible. Ma rolls over in bed and holds onto Pa from behind, who has been awake reading his phone, and braces herself for the day.
MA: OK hit me. What’s new?
PA: Nothing really.
MA: [!! Pause.] NOTHING?!
PA: [!! Pause.] Umm…
MA: [Lifts, head, raises eyebrows, bores holes into him with her eyes from behind him in bed.]
PA: Well… um… doctors in the Netherlands are researching the spread of COVID-19 in poo.
MA: [Lowers eyebrows, lowers head, exhales.] Ah. There ya go. See? You did it. THANK YOU Honey. [Closes eyes, smiles.]