Tuesday, November 17th 2015
Note: MIND THE DATE! The event described here happened a week ago, on 11/17/2015, totally irrespective of -but not impertinent to- the road trip we happen to be on now.
Having forgotten I missed my date with the gas pump the previous week, I was slogging through rush hour on the grinding ass-jam artery that is Route 1 North of Boston when my car went pleh-ehhhhhh. And nothing more.
“Sorry mom I gotta go. I think I just ran out of gas,” I said and hung up the phone. [Mystery accent: “I don’t always talk and drive, but when I do, it’s… an adventure.”]
I decided not to panic. Cars jammed up my butt in the middle lane and resigned to irk by on either side as I dialed 911. The dispatch officer was actually calm and supportive, figured out my location and sent in the troop. He arrived minutes later, blocked off a lane, reversed across it behind me, and loud-speakered, “STAY IN YOUR VEHICLE. I’M GOING TO PUSH YOU TO THE BREAKDOWN LANE. PUT IT IN NEUTRAL” and gently wammed me over, then got out and pushed my car some more himself. Dude!
This guy was all business. He talked to me long enough to tell me a tow was coming, and seemingly to ascertain that I’m not a psychopath, just an idiot in a clown hat. He spent more time inspecting the front of his grill with his flashlight.
Then comes the flat bed tow truck (taking no chances of leaving a disabled vehicle in that morass).
Unlike the Statey, this guy has me get out on the side of the road in rush hour, resplendent in my A-line polka dots and striped socks. Here he is, one of those fabulous blue collar guys who’s awesome at his job and is all business without being impersonal. Around here they also come decked out in Red Sox gear and a wicked pissah Bwostin accent.
A quick ride in the fantastically high P.O.V. of the truck’s cab and the driver’s workaday world, my car is deftly dropped at a gas pump, he says, “Can’t get better than’at,” $100 and we’re done.
I even avoided flack at work (albeit not so much at home). Mainly I was glad I decided not to panic, was thankful for all my blessings and how NOT a crisis this is and thankful for the lesson which I deserved on account of too much recent complacency on the gas tank department (obviously).
It was also sweet how retroactively concerned and relieved my mom was when she learned about it.
It was also great timing on account of the road trip we’re now on where needless to say we are comporting ourselves with the utmost care in the gas tank department and other related areas.